what does it mean when...?

So this is the second time in a week that Fitri and I decided to have our lunch at DHL. Foods are cheap but worth it despite it distance. Maybe the reason that I never quite know Fitri was that’s he’s being a bit too reserve to himself but a mild mannered person which is always a good quality in a person.

*****

Now back in my cubicle, looked at the time and apparently still got half an hour to spare. Called Magdeline, and gosh how I miss listening to her sweet voice. Hmmm…I think that’s when I heard myself questioning myself

are u sure that she’s just a dearest friend or u’ve been subconsciously denying that she’s more than that to u? Jamie? what r u thinking Jamie?…